“‘Valentine’s Day’ is being marketed as a Date Movie. I think it’s more of a First-Date Movie. If your date likes it, do not date that person again. And if you like it, there may not be a second date.”
Critics: Roger Ebert on Valentine’s Day (2010), Chicago Sun-Times
“This movie could have been made as a soft-core sex film, but it’s too restrained: There are so many palms carefully arranged in front of genital areas, and Brooke Shields’ long hair is so carefully draped to conceal her breasts, that there must have been a whole squad of costumers and set decorators on permanent Erogenous Zone Alert.”
Critics: Roger Ebert on The Blue Lagoon (1980), Chicago Sun-Times
“Sie schildern ein Treffen mit Uwe Johnson. Sie schildern es wunderbar. Das kann keiner besser als Sie. Aber es sind nur fünf Seiten von 781.”
Critics: Marcel Reich-Ranicki on Ein weites Feld by Günter Grass (1995), Der Spiegel (in German)
“It's terrible, though in such a bizarre way, unique even, that it might have prospects as a cult book, or at any rate an enduring curiosity. But I wouldn't bet on it.”
Critics: Owen Richardson on List of the Lost by Morrissey (2015), The Sydney Morning Herald
“This cover version of Moussorgsky's mouldy oldie does have a big new beat, but you can't dance to it, and the instrumentation seems a bit spare. Anyway, the truth is that I don't even listen to the original much.”
Critics: Robert Christgau on Emerson, Lake & Palmer – Pictures at an Exhibition (1972), Christgau's Consumer Guide
“Thou hast to be kidding.”
Critics: Anthony Lane on The Scarlet Letter (1995), The New Yorker
“I won't soon forget the spectacle of watching the mummified Sidney rise from his wheelchair to kick an intruder, unaccountably dressed in a moose costume, in the groin.”
Critics: Frank Rich on Moose Murders (1983), The New York Times
“Mr. Patterson and Mr. Choi seem to have thought about the social dimensions of fast food so much that they now see their target audience as problems to be solved, not customers to be pleased. The most nutritious burger on earth won't help you if you don't want to eat it.”
Critics: Pete Wells on Locol, Oakland (2017), The New York Times